Professor? How works human mating'
by LiLoDu
Summary: Tarzan is wondering how mating works for his human species. Who better to ask than Professor Porter? My first story, not sure about the rating...


**I do not own the characters, they belong to Disney.  
****This story is based on the Disney movie of Tarzan and takes place somewhere between the movie and the sequel/TV series. There is only this one chapter. **

**I am not a native speaker, so for grammar or spelling mistakes, please let me know in your Reviews and I'll correct them ASAP. Thank you very much! Now, enjoy!**

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A noise up in the trees. Tarzan paused swinging vines through the jungle and looked up.

Nothing.

But he didn't need to see anything, he knew what was going on.

Two apes of his pack were mating.

Not that there was anything wrong with that. It was a good thing. It made sure his herd or species would not become extinct. Not in this area anyway.

But since he had realized he was not one of them, he was a human, he had started wondering what mating would be like for his kind. Of course he would never ask Jane about these kind of things. She had taught him a lot but not how mating worked for humans.

Often he wondered, if she was ever going to teach him about it. And when that would be. Was she waiting for him to ask? After all, if it worked only a little similar to what gorillas did, he could imagine it was not a subject she felt comfortable to talk about.

Maybe the professor could help. He knew about natural science and surely also knew the difference between Gorilla and human mating.

Yes. Asking the professor about this might be the best idea, he decided. So he made his way up to the laboratory.

* * *

There he was, busy as always. The professor seemed to be mixing two liquids together. He looked very concentrating.

Tarzan walked towards him, slowly. He had learned that sneaking up on something or somebody did not work well for humans. He would frighten them. So instead, he had trained himself in walking normally, so they could see and hear him coming.

„Hello, professor.", Tarzan said, quietly.

„Oh hello, my boy." The professor did not look up to him but still was happy to see him. „What can I do for you?"

„Professor busy?", the ape man asked carefully. He did not want to disturb the professor in some important work.

„No, not at all. This can wait.", he said, putting all his tools down. „Now, what it is you came here for? If you're looking for Jane, I can't help you I'm afraid. I don't know where she has gone."

„No, not looking for Jane. Talk to you."

„Very well. Sit down then." The professor pointed out to a bench. Not a real bench though. It was rather a fallen tree but still good enough to sit on.

„Ok then, what it is you wanted to talk to me about?"

„I wonder how works human mating." Tarzan was very direct. He had always been. His English was still not very well but it seemed good enough for Jane and the professor to understand him. And he would learn. Sooner or later. After all, in those few weeks he had made great progress and now that he had human company and Jane was staying with him, he would learn so much more and one day he would be fluent.

„Oh.", the professor said, blushing and looking surprised. By now he had learned that Tarzan usually came up with the weirdest questions but this one really topped it all. Awkwardly his eyes looked around, searching for something he could distract Tarzan with, making him forget about his question.

„Sorry if bad question.", Tarzan said, standing up, ready to leave. Obviously he had put the professor into an uncomfortable situation.

„I-"

„No no, stay here. It's alright. It's a very good question. Sorry if I reacted a little strange."

Tarzan hesitated a second, then he sat down again, focusing the man opposite him.

„You know, for humans it's not so easy as for animals."

„Why not easy?"

„Has Jane told you about religion and god and all of that?"

„Yes. Said that is why we marry." Tarzan obviously did not really understand what 'getting married' meant. It was something Jane had brought up a while after she had decided to stay in the jungle with him. It seemed to be important to her, so he agreed to do it.

Of course she had not asked him to marry her. She was a lady and wanted to be proposed to. She cleverly tricked him into this subject and made him ask her. He had read between the lines that it was something she had been trying to get out of that topic but would never have admitted it. After she had given him little hints he had finally knelt down and asked her, unsure what it really meant in the end.

„Well, yes. People get married because of religions and all. But also because they love another and want to spend the rest of their lives together. Maybe we should start on what marriage means before we go into details."

Since the professor wanted to talk about marriage now, Tarzan assumed, those two things were somehow connected. „People marry to mate?"

„Yes and no. You see, when two people get married, they do it for love, not to 'mate'. And people don't call it 'mate'. We call it 'make love'."

Tarzan looked confused. „Why make more love? We already love."

„Oh I know that. That's just what it's called. Because people do not only 'mate' to make babies. They make love because it's something very special and a way to express your love to one another."

Now he was even more confused. „Not for making babies? How make babies then?"

„Oh they are made by doing that. But it's just not the only purpose of it. That's what the church will tell you but I can tell you it's so much more. But you will find out about it and then you will understand what I'm trying to say."

„I will find out when marry Jane?"

„Yes. She will let you know what to do, don't worry."

„Jane know how works 'making love'?" Tarzan was afraid she would think he couldn't do it. She had never laughed at him for not being able to do something but still, he would be hurt in his pride. She really knew so much which made him feeling stupid. But then again, if animals in the wilderness could do it, why wouldn't he be able to?

„No!", the professor answered quickly, shocked. His daughter was a proper lady, of course she hadn't made any experience yet with a man without being married to him. But then again he remember that Tarzan didn't know about this whole 'wait until being married'-thing. "I mean, not really, no. Well, theoretically, yes. She learned about that in school."

„In school? People learn in school about mating?" Tarzan was surprised. He had got the impression that this was rather a sensitive topic and people talked about it in school? He had learned what a school was and from what he had understood, it was a place where children gathered to learn things like to read and write and about history and all those other things, Jane and the professor had taught him about. On the other hand, he had also learned about what Jane had called 'biology' which included all those natural things. Maybe the mating process counted into this also.

„Well, not exactly about 'mating', no. They learn about how babies are made and how they develop and also how the human body develops. You know how babies are made, don't you?"

„Yes. By mating."

The professor sighed. This was going to be a very long talk.

„Yes, by mating. Right. But do you know what exactly happens during the 'act of mating'?"

Now Tarzan blushed a little. „Yes. I saw with Gorillas. Is same as humans?"

„Yes, it's basically the same. But do you know how this all happens? I mean, what exactly happens?"

„Yes. Mother told me."

Now the professor looked surprised. „Oh, did she? What did she tell you?" He was really curious to find out how gorillas taught their young about the facts of life.

„She said male and female join and make baby."

„And how exactly do they 'join'?"

Again, Tarzan blushed. Back then, it seemed just as a normal thing to him. It was just what it was. But now that he had a female of his species around, it was all different.

„Male behind female and ...", he searched for the right words. Helplessly he looked into the professor's eyes.

„Ok, I think that's basically what happens for all type of mammals. But for humans it's a little different."

„How different?"

„Well, the 'act' is technically the same. Just the 'male behind female' part is a little different."

Tarzan looked at him. He was very confused and not sure, if he was ever going to learn about this. This seemed like a really complicated subject and that there was so much to know about.

But since the professor had a daughter, Tarzan assumed, he must have done all this himself at some point. So he probably was the best source of information he could get.

The professor thought a moment, not sure how to say what he wanted to say. In the end he decided to make it as simple as possible. After all, Tarzan seemed to know the important part already anyway

„For humans, the female usually lays on her back and the female lays on top of her, facing her. Do you understand what I'm trying to say?"

Tarzan nodded.

„Good. Well, that's the only difference I guess. But you know, it's supposed to be the most natural thing in the world. You'll know what to do when the time comes. It'll all come naturally to you. And again, Jane will know what to do, too."

Tarzan nodded again. The professor was probably right. If animals did it, without having a biology course in any sort of school, how hard could it be?

„Alright then. I guess that's all there is to say about that. Like I said, you'll learn it all by doing it. That's how we all did. Oh, one more thing. Humans don't do 'it' up in the trees."

Wow, Tarzan thought, humans really were different. "Where humans do?"

"Well, usually at home in bed. After two people got married, they share a bed and this would be the only private place."

Having heard this, Tarzan suddenly understood why Jane acted so strange when they were arranging the bed while getting his parents' old tree house ready. They had started cleaning and fixing it, so that they could move in once they were married.

She had said she wanted _them_ to sleep in the little room at the corner of the main living area. Back then, he assumed by _them_ she meant her and her father. He didn't really understand that since they had had separate tents before. But then again, he had learned that there was so much more to learn about humans that he didn't understand yet.

* * *

„Thank you, Professor." Tarzan stood up from his seat and walked off into the jungle. He had to think about this again. There was a lot to learn and yet, it seemed all so simple.

„Oh, Tarzan. Wait. There is something I forget to say."

Tarzan turned around and sat back down. „Yes, Professor?"

The professor couldn't hold back a smile when he watched his son-in-law-to-be acting like a boy in school, being called back by his teacher.

„I almost forget the most important thing you need to know about humans."

The jungle man looked up, listening closely.

„I don't know how it is with animals, but you must know something about human females. I thought this might be good for you to know, so you will not freak out and are aware of it."

The professor looked at the man before him, who still listened patiently, absorbing all the old wise man was telling him.

„You know, when you do it for the first time, it can happen that you hurt Jane."

Tarzan shrugged. „Hurt? Tarzan no hurt Jane! Never!"

„I know, I know. I'm just saying it can happen. It's natural. That's because there is a little... how can I explain that to you in the easiest way? A little 'barrier' inside that will break when you do it the first time. So I just want to you to be aware of this, so that you know what's happening and don't freak out. I know you don't want to hurt her and that's very good. But it is possible, so please be very gentle and careful, ok?"

Tarzan started to freak out already. He would never hurt Jane! Never ever! He loved her and would always protect her from any sort of harm. How could he love her the way humans usually did if he was going to hurt her?

„Don't worry, my boy. You're gonna be just fine. It doesn't need to happen. I'm just saying it could. So please be careful and try to be as gentle as possible."

The professor realized how much he had now scared the poor man. But he knew it was better to tell him beforehand than to throw him in at the deep end. When their time comes and nature would take its course, he might be overtaken by his instincts and natural drive and rush into things. After all, it was his daughter, his little girl, who was going to be involved in it, too. So to make sure everything was going to be as it should, he better taught him beforehand. And in the end, he wanted his daughter to be hurt as least as possible.

* * *

Tarzan thanked the professor again and then left. The wedding was planned for the day after tomorrow. That would be two days to figure this all out. He was nervous now. Scared and under the impression to know even less than before, he returned to his pack. If only everything went right...


End file.
